Standing with Serena

I’ll start this off by saying… I have an issue with anyone who wants to tear down a woman. I have an even larger problem with the deeply entrenched patriarchal systems and societal structures deliberately designed to oppress, objectify, and diminish women’s autonomy and humanity.

When I first heard about Blake Lively starring in It End With Us, I was so excited. Gossip Girl is my go-to comfort show, and I watch it every Fall (not kidding… I could recite episodes). Immediately, I was met with friends, peers, and the media criticizing her age, her looks, her brand, her acting, and just about everything about her. This is what I mean; even women are criticizing and humiliating other women. Lively is a professional actress and you don’t have to like her, but last time I checked the people criticizing her were just consumers of the entertainment industry. So really, they are just opinions (deeply rooted in misogyny), but still, it seems like everyone has a problem. I heard simple praises when people found out about Justin Baldoni being cast as Ryle. “Oh, he is so attractive” and “I loved his role in Jane the Virgin”.

Personally, I did not hear one degrading comment about him.

In January 2023, Blake Lively was cast as Lily Bloom, the lead character in It Ends With Us. She also served as a co-executive producer on the film. Justin Baldoni was cast as Ryle Kincaid and directed the film. Jamey Heath was the producer and then-president of Wayfarer Studios. Lively claimed Baldoni had improvised unwanted kissing and discussed his sex life, including encounters in which he said he may not have received consent. Lively alleged that he and lead producer Jamey Heath repeatedly entered her makeup trailer uninvited while she was undressed, including when she was breastfeeding.

On December 31st, 2024, Lively formally filed a lawsuit in New York federal court against Baldoni, his publicist, Wayfarer Studios, and other defendants for "retaliating against her for reporting sexual harassment and workplace safety concerns.

So, what happened between January and December of this past year?

I’ll tell you…

Baldoni directed and co-starred with Lively in “It Ends With Us,” the movie adaptation of Colleen Hoover’s bestseller, which was released last August. After the production of the movie, several rumors emerged about Baldoni and Lively around the movie’s release. Then when the film went on a press tour Lively blatantly avoided discussing Baldoni in the interviews.

This was when Baldoni decided to hire Melissa Nathan, a crisis PR manager who represented Johnny Depp in his defamation case against ex-wife Amber Heard. Nathan suggested plans of social takedowns and creating media to demonstrate how horrible Lively is to work with to counteract the “bad press” Baldoni was attracting. So, this was the start of the smear campaign…

At this time, the media was BASHING Lively by pulling out soundbites of her saying unpleasant or tone-deaf things in interviews and interpreting her lack of acknowledgment of Baldoni as a way of taking credit for the film. Once again, the media creates its own explanations and decides to incite internalized misogyny amongst the public. Ok, I needed to get that one out…

Sources told TMZ that Baldoni had "fat-shamed" Lively by asking about her weight. On

December 20th, Lively filed a complaint with the California Civil Rights Department claiming Baldoni invaded her privacy by "entering her makeup trailer uninvited while she was undressed," and pressured her to lose weight. Lively had recently given birth to her fourth child…

I will totally attest to the fact that I have been fighting against the smear campaign before I even knew it was a smear campaign. My own friends would say that Lively was a capitalistic monster and greedy for promoting her business, “Blake Brown” in interviews, or that she was insensitive because she did not speak out about domestic violence (a main premise of It Ends With Us)… There were several other mentions of her past decisions and clips of her in shows, interviews, and anything else the media could find to paint her in a bad light. To say the media was ripping her apart would be an understatement. To all of this, I would say, it is unfortunate how she came across in some interviews and some of her life choices, but are we seriously looking up to celebrities now? She was mostly targeted for the way she spoke or did not speak about domestic violence and resources for victims. It’s worth noting that all celebrities operate under intense scrutiny in the public eye. We expect so much eloquence and a perfect moral/ethical high ground out of every public figure. Instead, I would attest that Blake Lively and many other public figures are allowed to be misunderstood. In the case of Lively not speaking about the tragedy and vast issue of domestic violence, I would turn to the direction of the author, Colleen Hoover. She chooses to speak out about her experience and connection to domestic violence. Why were we putting so much pressure on Blake Lively to make this beautiful and resonating statement about a very sensitive and traumatic topic?

What infuriates me about the smear campaign, lawsuits, and social media uproar, is that people now think they are entitled to the opinion of who is in the right and who is in the wrong. They are either Team Blake or Team Justin. As a society, we love to choose sides in sexual abuse allegations. Why is that? Why is it that our first thought is “let’s examine if the woman is making a legitimate accusation (in a male/female sexual assault allegation, when the woman is the victim),”? People have decided to break apart the specifics of the accuser’s character and the allegedly accused character from what we see on television, in interviews, and in public brands (in cases in the public eye) to determine who is a credible source in this sexual assault allegation. Does this seem off to anyone else? I hope it resonates and I hope you see the trend.

The bottom line is Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni were employed on the same set for the movie It Ends With Us. Lively claims she was sexually harassed during the production of the movie. Who are we to disbelieve a woman? To question the strength and courage it takes for her to bring this to the attention of the justice system? Why should we ever cast doubt on her truth?

I believe that the media often fails to articulate a critical reality: it is highly common for men to exploit stereotypes of women as vindictive, delusional, hysterical, and/or oversensitive to systematically frame a misinterpretation of an abuser’s behavior as innocent. By this, I am referring to the initial hire of the PR manager to save Baldoni’s image. The smear campaign was a deliberate mechanism to delegitimize and downplay the experience Lively came to share about her harassment experience. The continuation of the smear campaign serves the one purpose of proving Lively to be unstable and untrustworthy, especially when challenging male authority or privilege. As Lively beautifully reported to The Times, “I hope that my legal action helps pull back the curtain on these sinister retaliatory tactics to harm people who speak up about misconduct and helps protect others who may be targeted,”. For men, these stereotypes provide a convenient way to deflect accountability. By casting doubt on their accusers’ motives or mental states, they shift the focus away from their actions, framing themselves as victims of false allegations rather than perpetrators of harm. This narrative not only protects abusive men but also disincentivizes other victims from coming forward, fearing that they too will be dismissed or discredited.

I’m going to take 50 words to talk about the lawyer Baldoni hired: Bryan Freedom. On the Megyn Kelly show, Freedom states, "Blake Lively, if she was sexually harassed to such a degree in this film and this situation, you know, she wouldn't have returned to the film,".

I’m going to let that sink in. “She wouldn’t have returned to the film,”. Who is Freedman to assume how a woman should respond to abuse? No one, especially a man, has the authority to dictate the decisions or actions of a woman navigating the complexities of trauma. Suggesting otherwise dismisses the myriad of reasons women may choose to stay in challenging environments—be it fear, professionalism, or survival. This is her livelihood.

I applaud Blake Lively and her commitment to take legal action. Many women are not afforded the privilege to speak out, fight for justice, or raise awareness about the assault or harassment they have endured.

With gratitude,

Olivia